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A Failure

We talk so much about success and celebrating it and we forget that there is a big hidden part behind it. We all have different definitions of success and i'm glad we have that choice though I'm not so sure about how we all try to hide our failures.

A big part of our life involves going through small and random failure and yet we decide it's necessary to keep it hidden to look good. Which makes sense, since you wouldn't get a job if your resume is just filled with failures.

Though, I'm not fond of the fact that it makes us seem like we aren't human and that failure isn't okay.

I've heard people say this to me a few times in the past few weeks in lieu of recent layoffs, "I see that you aren't worried. Oh obviously, you'll just get another job like it's nothing". Usually, I ignore it and move on but considering the frequency of this statement; I had to give it another thought. I realised that people don't know the other side of the story at all and that's on me because like everyone else, I never spoke much about the things that didn't go right.

Let's try to change that a bit. Let's see what the generic definition of success is:

The achievement of something desired, planned, or attempted

The gaining of fame or prosperity

That's from Google. Here's a list of a few failures of mine, based on that

  1. I'm going to involve things that I do sometimes wish I had
    1. Not a master of any domain
    2. 0 successful side projects
    3. 0 successful oss projects
    4. Haven't built anything remotely impactful
  2. Lol, not famous at all, so a big failure here

Now, let's put down my definition of success (the post would be of no meaning otherwise)

Growth in overall knowledge and a decent income to be able to code and make things I love

A pretty boring and "trying to sound smart" kinda definition but now let's see the chain of failures since the goal is a long running one.

2017

2018

2019

To be fair, there's a lot more as I got deeper into the tech industry but, that's not the point of this.

If you came to meet me and these are the only points I told you about, you'd probably think I'm dumb, depressed and just like complaining and blaming the world. You wouldn't expect me to be working for NearForm or someone maintaining quite a few OSS projects.

The point isn't that I've failed in both the generic sense and in the my own definition but to put them down and see that just failures don't show the complete picture.

Putting down just one side of the story doesn't make sense and never will, the only kind of people impressed by just listening to all your achievements are people living in an land of delusion where every expert just wants to join their firm/company because it's the best there is.

I probably should write my achievements, I'd look like a depressed lunatic if I didn't. Though, readers of the blog know that I'm not depressed and probably just a lunatic.

End of the day,

I wouldn't be able to learn and tap into different domains, work on random projects that no one but I use if I just ignored my past and was entitled to whatever little I had accomplished. It's fun to celebrate the little achievements, just don't get lost in it.

Also don't get lost in things that don't go as planned, not everything has to work out according to your and that's the fun part about it. It'd get repetitive and boring otherwise.

That's it for the now, Adios!